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How to be successful: The theory of relativity explained in 30 seconds

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Last time, I was talking about fear of failure which is also another way of describing fear of success.

Low self esteem cons you into feeling like you are 'a failure'. But to be 'a success' we need to get beyond simplistic notions of 'success' or 'failure'.

Why?

Because failure is a relative term.

Look at it this way;

If I take a degree in Spanish, I might study for a few years and pick up lots of great Spanish. But what if, for some reason I don't actually finish the degree?

Is this a total failure? Or is it a partial success? I might, as a result of that study, now be able to chat fluently in Spanish (relative success) but I don't have my degree (relative 'failure').

If I suffer from perfectionism I may not 'convert' the relative part of the success and feel myself to be a 'total failure!'

If a relationship 'failed' then we can see that as 'total failure' or maybe not. Because you had that relationship you learned lots of useful things which will help your future relationships - that is a kind of success - in the long term anyway.

A failure on one level is often a success on another, when we're less black-or-white about it.

The Scottish pharmacologist Sir Alexander Fleming succeeded in accidentally discovering penicillin (which has indirectly saved hundreds of millions of lives) through failing to clear away cultures of staphylococci on a bench in a corner of his laboratory.

Failing in school might be the catalyst for a successful career in art, who knows?

Loosen up your thinking around what constitutes 'success' and 'failure' and both fear of failure and fear of success will evaporate helping you be braver about what you try.

Do you feel you're not as good as other people?

Click here to get my free bite-sized self esteem tips sent straight to your email inbox that you can use to feel better right away.

To your flexible thinking and 'success',

Mark

PS Check out the 'Overcome Fear of Success' download - it can help you feel much more relaxed about going for what you want.

Published by mark.tyrrell March 8th, 2016 in