I can't stop worrying about work.

I am so worried all the time about work. I can't sleep some nights. I am in a very well paid job and have built up financial commitments because of this so feel that I cannot go on to something less high powered.

This question was submitted by 'Jonah'

Mark says...

Thank you for writing in. You say you are not able to change your work circumstances because of finanancial commitments so, at least for the moment, all you can do is to change the way you respond to your work. This doesn't mean caring about it less but rather knowing how to 'switch off' from it when you are not actually there. Picking away in your mind at work issues when you are not actually at work, during your time off is like doing a whole heap of unpaid overtime. I hope you can really begin to respect your time enough when it's your time. I suggest you develop some 'demarkation' rituals to help you 'decompress' from the stresses of work. Switch off all email, texting or other messaging devices after a certain time so you have time. Take 10 minutes to close your eyes and relax when you come in from work. Remind yourself that you are now entering a different part of the day and visualize all work issues filtering out of your mind and body, leaving your fresh and clear. You might also visualize a dog shaking itself dry because it has now left the pool it was swimming in. Once you have taken time to relax in this way, engage in some other demarkation ritual such as showering, changing clothes and think about what you really want to do during 'your time'. If you find your mind wandering back to work then remind yourself that your mind as well as your body is now in leisure time and that you will think about that (work issue) when you are actually at work. Worrying is powered by anxiety and once you begin to phsycially relax more then the contents of your mind will reflect your lowered stress levels and what seemed like 'big issues' before will start to feel more manageable.

Ultimately you will work even better when you rest even better - just as when we are better able to breath out when we take time to breath in. Develop out of work interests so you can feel and be more well rounded, and socialize with people who you don't work with. All the very best, Mark.