How can I sensitively suggest my brother has a problem?
Hi Mark, I found your website after searching for information on Hypersensitivity to noise and after looking at your website my family and I believe that my brother could be suffering from Misophonia. We really want to help him as it is seriously affecting his happiness and wellbeing, but we’re not sure what would be the best way to broach the subject with him as he is very defensive, irritable, short tempered and believes it is the fault of others around him. Would you be able to suggest how we could approach my brother so as not to upset him further and encourage him to seek help? Many thanks Steph
This question was submitted by 'stephclee'
Mark says...
Hi Steph, misophonia, excessive noise sensitivity, can be so crippling for people living with it. In my experience there is often a kind of 'doublethink' in people suffering with it in that, on one level, they know they have a problem with noise and are hyper-aware but at the same time can't help but feel angry and anxious about all the noises they hear, feeling that others are to blame for their massive lack of consideration. But it sounds like your brother, right now, just feels that others are insensitive and uncaring but hasn't yet percieved that it seems to bother him more than others. I don't think you can make him see he is misophonic, if he is, but you might read him accounts of other people who are and leave it at that.
You might even ask him what he thinks about my article on nosie sensitivity and whether he thinks there really is such a thing as 'misophonia' and whether he feels the 80 or so comments are valid or whether he thinks these people are making a condition out of nothing. In this way you are not suggesting anything to him but you are asking for an opinion. If he tends to automatically disagree with what you say around this issue, try saying that you feel that maybe this condition isn't really a condition at all - then he might find that, because of an automatic need to be a bit contrary, he starts to feel that maybe it is a condition worth thinking about. I hope that makes sense.
All the very best and your brother is lucky to have such a caring sister,
Mark
Published by Mark Tyrrell -
January 15th, 2014 
