There are as many different psychological problems out there as there are people. No one's experience of depression, or anxiety problems - to take but two examples - is exactly the same. The details are bound to differ. Nonetheless, there are fundamental patterns that all problems share.
We are sticklers for the 'big view' at hypnosisdownloads.com and believe that you cannot address a problem effectively without fully understanding the psychological principles that underpin it. So our hypnosis sessions include up to date psychology blended with hypnotic approaches. I want to focus on three of our new sessions and some of the thinking and inspiration that went into creating them.
Don't Take It Personally
Life becomes exhausting when we constantly feel on the defense, on the look out for slights, insults or perceived disrespect from others. 'What did they mean by that?' 'Why are they looking at me funny?' 'I feel like people always blame me!' The Don't take it personally session addresses the issue of always 'taking things to heart' or, in fashionable psychobabble, tending to 'internalize the negative'. If we habitually blame ourselves then we tend to expect other people to do so as well (even when they don't).
Of course, sometimes people do attack us personally, but taking things personally when they were not intended as such prevents us focusing on what is really important, or the job in hand. People prone to depression tend to blame themselves when things go wrong but give others credit when stuff works out well. People prone to disabling anger tend to feel that others are more antagonistic than they really are (hence the anger).
Always seeking approval
Clearly, learning not to take things so personally can help both the anger and the depression prone person stabilize their moods, and talking of moods - how much of your mood is determined by your assessment of how well you have pleased those around you?
Some people are constantly seeking approval. It's great to be considerate, of course, and some reflection on how we appear to others is good and natural. But if the hope of pleasing others becomes the sole source of motivation for action, the internal emotional compass goes awry. 'People pleasing' as an emotional compulsion may seem like it's focused on other people, but in fact it's a self-focused pursuit aimed at seeking reassurance.
Insecurity, habit and the need for reassurance all drive chronic approval seeking and it becomes even more of a lose/lose situation when the approval seeker compulsively tries to get it from those who are, for whatever reason, unable to give it. As the saying goes: 'If you try to please everyone you end up pleasing no one.' Feeling insecure is what drives incessant attempts to please everyone, and insecurity breeds uncertainty, which drives us to seek a sense of certainty. But, of course, much of life is neither simple nor certain. 'Do they like me?' 'Are they pleased with this?' 'Is it OK?'
Coping with Uncertainty
The third session I want to look at is also linked with this theme. Living with uncertainty is a major life skill. If you can relax with not knowing how exactly an event, party, work project is going to pan out then you don't have to be insecure or resort to control freakery.
Relaxing with the uncertainty of how your speech will go means you don't have to get anxious. Relaxing with not knowing exactly what someone is thinking means you can feel more secure in relationships. And relaxing with uncertainty in general means that you are less likely to get depressed, anxious, or angry - because all these states require that you to assign meaning before evidence.
For example, the depressed person, unable to relax with not knowing, may assume that a friend hasn't returned their call yet because they no longer want to be a friend. If you can sit comfortably with not yet knowing why someone hasn't called back rather than urgently and prematurely becoming certain, then you have a major life skill at your disposal for facing life's ups and downs.
Mark's Favourite Download
My top favorite hypnosis download for this month has got to be. drum roll. Vacation mode. Why on earth.? I hear you gasp. Well, it's all about getting into the holiday/vacation 'zone' very quickly. I've had (and I'm sure you have had) many a two week holiday that only started to feel like a holiday in the second week, or even only in the last few days.
It seems it takes a lot of time to shift from the email answering, call returning, deadline focused, time bound mind set into the more laid back, receptive, living rather than just 'doing' kind of vacation fellow I want to be when I'm actually on vacation. Holiday destinations the world over are full of anxious looking individuals prowling the beaches in their swimwear all agitated and feeling they ought to be 'doing something', culture shocked by the change from office to forest, from PC screen to sun screen and from deadline to shore line. I love travel and vacationing (and I feel I'm not alone in this) and anything that can help me 'get in the holiday spirit' as soon as I arrive has my vote :)
No cost Audio Insight - This free audio session shows just why relaxation is so important in your life and how modern life takes its toll on our minds and bodies.
Listen to this new audio insight here.
