Get the courage to leave an abusive relationship

Realizing that you are in an abusive relationship is a big step. Other people often see it before you do. You may have been surprised by a friend saying, "How can you let them treat you like that?"

The shift in the balance of 'power' within an abusive relationship can be a gradual thing. The abusive behavior can begin quite subtly; the odd criticism here or sarcastic quip there.

Bit by bit your self esteem gets chipped away. And because it's so gradual it can be hard to notice.

Making excuses for the abusive partner

If you are like many who find themselves in abusive relationships you may make excuses for them or somehow feel you are to blame. . They 'love you really' or they are 'under a lot of pressure from work'. They make excuses: 'You know I don't mean it!' Or: 'I'm just trying to help!' Or: 'No one could ever love you like I do!'

These manipulations can get under your skin, but the fact is abusive behavior is abusive however it is wrapped up.

An abusive relationship is not a relationship at all

A true relationship is mutually supportive and encouraging, you spend time talking together without fear of being judged, shouted at or worst physically violated. You don't attack one another's personalities, you give negative feedback with a view that your partner is basically good and that any negatives are a small part of who they are - not everything!

Safety first

Your safety is top priority. Violence is never acceptable and if you have started excusing any violence towards you then your self esteem has really taken a battering. You need to get out because it's dangerous. There is no excuse in the world for violence, constant nit picking or verbal bullying.

If you want to end the relationship but are too afraid then this session may be for you. It's important to have an escape plan which may mean knowing where you are going to live, how you are going to finance yourself and how you will socialize.

We emphasize that if, in anyway you are physically frightened of your abusive partner then make sure other people are close by when you finally split - don't be alone with them. And if they are physically abusive make sure you have a safe place to go to if you've been living with them.

Having the courage to make the break

You may have been brainwashed into thinking that you can't function without your abusive partner. If you've been abused then you have been dominated by this person and because of that you may feel scared of them to some extent. This may make the thought of finishing with them terrifying.

Remember you are not a punch bag or someone to be 'put straight' by anyone else. If the person you are with has made you feel inadequate, useless and fearful then it's it may be time to escape the abusive relationship.

Of course there may be children involved and it might not be that easy but you have to put your physical safety first. If you feel you can't or don't want to leave then you may be better listening to: How to deal with the angry bully and How to deal with the negative critic.

If you know in your heart of hearts you've got to get out of this abusive relationship then this session is for you.

Download Abusive Relationship Courage to leave now and make the break.

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