Archive for March, 2012
Downloads Unwrapped - March 2012
Plan your future for genuine success
You probably envisage a life for yourself in the future. Perhaps it's markedly different from the one you have now or maybe just more of what you have now. We can't, of course, predict everything that's going to happen to us but it's fair to say that the more of a sense we have of where we want to be and what we want to do, the more likely we are to get there. Many years ago Roger Elliott, his future wife and I sat down and pretended we had taken our business to where we wanted it to be five years hence. Lyndsay asked Roger and me "What are you doing now?" and "What does the business look like, and how well is it doing?" and other questions like that. We lied (I prefer to say 'role-played') until we came to feel like we believed in our business's future. It's amazing how telling it how you'd like it to be can make you really feel like you're already there. But Lyndsay didn't stop there. She asked us in great detail what we had done to get to where we were/pretended we were. She made us answer all her questions, as credibly as possible, relating to all the steps we'd taken to grow the business. She then wrote down our steps and Hey presto! we had a step-by-step guide into our future. We made-believe all the detail as well as the 'glory bits' and you know what? Five years later we had surpassed the goals we set ourselves on that night. When we imagine a preferred future, we tend to focus on the outcome rather than the steps that brought about that outcome. When you strongly imagine the steps, they start to feel compelling, almost as if you have to complete them. Envisaging steps also gives you a sense of how realistic they are or the best way to approach them. And research has shown that imagining what you want without visualizing the steps you need to take can be counterproductive and you are much more likely to realize your dreams when you envisage the path to them.(1) The new Plan your future download focuses on helping you visualise the processes that are involved in reaching a goal, rather than just the end-state of achieving it.
Fear of public transport: Overcoming the terror of the train
I worked with a woman once who had travelled on the London Underground every day for thirty years, to and from her work. In her mid-fifties she hit upon a particularly stressful period in her life. She had business worries, her marriage was in crisis and her mother was dying. When stress levels are higher than normal then they can easily 'spill over' into a sense of panic. The environment in which stress turns to panic can then be tagged by the emotional parts of the brain as threatening. One day this lady found herself in a crowded underground train, people were pushing and shoving and she suddenly felt herself panicking. She felt like she was going to die. The next time she tried to go on the tube she panicked again and then the fear spread to any situation that even vaguely reminded her of the tube, such as an overground train or bus. When she came to see me she was desperate. I worked to help greatly lower her general sense of stress then more specifically to calm her emotional associations to public transport, until she felt able again to master her stress levels and feel calm in these times. Public transport fear is so common and can have such profound effects that, well, I cant believe we haven't produced this Fear of public transport download session until now!
Facing the fear of women
Fear of women is perhaps more common than many woman know. It can stem from feeling victimized by a powerful woman in the past or may have come about through too little contact with women. Whatever and whomever we don't encounter can come to seem scarily 'different'.
Sexual inexperience and/or having been bullied by females, unless something is done about it, can cause a life-long distrust of and fear of women in men. Fear between the genders is more commonly seen as flowing exclusively from women toward men, but of course, fear being what it is, it can arise in anyone and be directed toward just about anything or anyone. I had a friend at school whose mother belittled him in front of us, his friends. He went on to work for a tyrannical woman boss and seemed to find himself involved with women who were domineering, to say the least. It took him some time to relax around any woman, no matter how friendly and decent they were.
Technically, fear of woman is known as gynophobia. For some it's little more than shyness towards the opposite sex and may peak in early adolescence when general awkwardness and embarrassment around girls may be par of the course for many boys. But because women really scare some men we've produced the new Fear of women download - because sometimes what seems to be an intense dislike is really disguised fear.
(1) See: From Thought to Action: Effects of Process-Versus Outcome-Based Mental Simulations on Performance. Lien B. Pham, University of California, Los Angeles 1997 http://psp.sagepub.com/content/25/2/250.abstract
Full hypnosis download Plan your future
I’ve noticed that people can come to feel disappointed in life. As if they had just hoped good stuff would happen to them, or thought the good life would arrive if they just believed in it. If you’re hoping to travel someplace but never make it, it could be you set out in the wrong direction, or never studied the map or even got a map. Sure, some people get lucky, they’re the right person in the right place at the right time, but they still had to become the right person.
When it comes to where you want to be ‘at’ in your future, there are two very common mistakes people make:
- never sitting down and actually figuring out what you really want from life
- fantasizing about how marvellous it will be but never working out how to make it happen (why ruin a dream with boring practical stuff, eh?)
Well, you can live like this, of course, but it’s a failure to take any responsibility for what happens to you. And it can lead you into avoiding decisions, so that you can stay in fantasy land where the chance of failure is zero.
Research has shown that hypnotically rehearsing or fantasizing about the future as you want it to be without also hypnotically rehearsing the steps you need to get there makes you, not surprisingly, less likely to succeed. (1)
Positive expectation is important but so is strategy. Practical step planning can feel hard and unrewarding. It’s much more fun, and very effective, to pin down the steps you need to follow by ‘working backwards’ – hypnotically travelling into your preferred future and then ‘looking back’ from that future at all the steps you’ve taken as if you’ve already taken them.
This may sound strange to you but we at hypnosisdownloads.com can attest that it works powerfully to make the steps to success as compelling as the fantasy of success. Because that’s exactly what my colleagues and I did 13 years ago when starting up Uncommon Knowledge and HD.com. The new plan your future download gives you the opportunity not just to focus on what you want but to clear the pathway toward your dreams and goals.
All the best
Full hypnosis download Speak up in class
Even for children who aren’t generally shy, speaking up in class can sometimes feel daunting. Perhaps they feel overshadowed by other very confident outgoing kids who might tend to monopolize class discussion times. Or maybe they fear being ‘under the spotlight’ and feel they will make a fool of themselves or even be picked on for saying something ‘wrong’. Fear to speak up in class can also stem from:
- not wanting to appear too clever
- not wanting to appear stupid
- not wanting to bring attention to themselves
- merely through habit - if you don’t speak in class you won’t speak in class.
But if a diffident child can be encouraged to start speaking their mind, asking and answering questions, and to organise their thinking and ideas enough to articulate them early on, it can make a huge difference to them later in life.
So many adults I see for fear of public speaking (even just in work meetings) trace their anxiety back to feelings of social paralysis when they were kids. So I’d say that a great time to learn confidence in class is when you are still a child. The new speak up in class gently blends hypnotic story telling and deep healthy rest and calm to naturally teach habits of easy confidence and self belief for children in the classroom.
All the best